Coping with Postpartum Depression

It's time for me to share part of my business journey and that includes postpartum depression and a lot of loneliness.

Here's your trigger warning !

In 2017 I delivered triplets at 29 weeks.

Alhumdulillah, it was only by the grace of God that these beautiful miracles entered this world. To say the next few months were a whirlwind would be an understatement. My family and I were all on call to help with the babies feedings and diaper change and all of the other lovely parts of newborn life (not lovely at all, imho).

I struggled throughout the entire pregnancy with depression and anxiety and I wasn't surprised that I was hit with severe postpartum depression.

I went from running a successful business and living an entirely independent life to wondering if I would ever have any independence again.

I would often think, I only have 2 hands to carry 2 car seats and 2 babies and hold 2 hands...how will I ever everrrr do this with 3.

I was in a deep dark hole of sadness and loneliness and despite having an extremely supportive family, I was just in so deep.

So how did I cope with postpartum depression?

The first thing that helped me climb out of that hole was when my friend and fellow entrepreneur, Lindsay, by the grace of Allah, offered to help me start a blog. She knew I needed something to call my own - a little escape from the day to day routine of feeding babies and washing bottles, etc.

Lindsay helped me start Salam Sudduf - what initially started as a mommy blog!

I started to feel like my "old" self again. Writing about motherhood and being able to share struggles with other moms online made me feel seen and supported. I wasn't alone anymore!

I'm not going to sit here and say it got me out of postpartum depression - because that was a combination of several things, including

  • starting my blog,

  • going for therapy,

  • hiring help, etc.

But it most definitely started me on a path of self discovery and honoring myself as an individual with hopes and dreams, regardless of whatever title ("mommy") I was given.

What's the point of sharing this with you? It's to remind you that:

(a) "This too shall pass" - if you are going through hardship, remember that Allah has promised that with hardship comes ease, so have faith that ease is coming. He promised and His promise is true. And;

(b) For my life to change, I had to do something different. Starting the blog was big and scary and really quite hard. But I knew if I kept doing the same thing day in and day out, nothing would change in my life. So I had to try something different. And you know by now that I didn't stick to that blog, but it didn't matter what I started with, what mattered was I took that first step.

I've never really shared this story publicly at all and I'm a bit nervous, but hopeful that it will help someone out there. I know you may be struggling with something really big right now and when you think about your future, you can't seem to say anything changing.

I just want to remind you that Allah has a plan for you - bigger than what you wrote down in your goals list, and bigger than your mind can imagine.

I never ever imagined this life I am living right now. Never. God is greater.

With all the peaks and troughs of life, time never stays the same. Now, with my triplets at four years old and starting school this year (I still can’t believe it!), I realize how important it was for me to have the support I needed when they were babies. Don’t get me wrong, I still need support and lots of it, and that’s because raising children is not one person’s responsibility. Their right about needing a village to raise a child!

When we are vulnerable with each other, we create space for us to explore our emotions without judgement and accept that it’s okay to NOT be okay sometimes. As a new mom you will undoubtedly feel a range of emotions and everyone around you, including you, need to be prepared for that. If you are interested in resources to help you cope with PPD then, here are some useful links.

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